Check out my other internet homes: TwitterFacebookTumblr (3.0; @riseaxelblog)http://riseaxelblog.com/<img src="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyzapcNDPW1qe6vsbo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://gq.tumblr.com/post/17155656294/zanesville-zoo-escape-longreads" target="_blank">gq</a>:</p> <blockquote> <h3><a href="http://www.gq.com/news-politics/newsmakers/201203/terry-thompson-ohio-zoo-massacre-chris-heath-gq-february-2012#ixzz1lcH068E5" target="_blank">18 Tigers, 17 Lions, 8 Bears, 3 Cougars, <br/>2 Wolves, 1 Baboon, 1 Macaque, <br/>and 1 Man Dead in Ohio</a></h3> <p><a href="http://www.gq.com/news-politics/newsmakers/201203/terry-thompson-ohio-zoo-massacre-chris-heath-gq-february-2012#ixzz1lcH068E5" target="_blank">Your longread of the day / week / month / year?</a> GQ’s Chris Heath brings you the astonishing true story of the Zanesville zoo massacre—which began when a depressed, desperate man named Terry Thompson turned loose his 56 exotic animals in rural Ohio, touching off a mass slaughter that was covered around the world. Below, just a very brief portion of the story from its opening section. The full piece is <a href="http://www.gq.com/news-politics/newsmakers/201203/terry-thompson-ohio-zoo-massacre-chris-heath-gq-february-2012#ixzz1lcH068E5" target="_blank">here</a>. Read it. We solemnly swear you will not be disappointed.</p> <blockquote> <p>Inside the barn Sam Kopchak locked the doors, then telephoned his mother, sitting in front of the TV about a hundred yards away back in the house. There was, he told her, “a major problem.” They’d long known that there were strange and unusual animals kept out of sight over the brow of the hill around Thompson’s house—often they could hear lions bellow and roar. “We didn’t have any idea how many there were,” Mrs. Kopchak would later reflect. But they assumed that these two runaways must have come from there, so the first thing Mrs. Kopchak did was to dial her neighbor’s number.</p> <p>No answer.</p> <p>Only then did she call 911 and alert the world. She sounded calm when she reported what her son had seen, as though there was really nothing too strange or alarming about a lion and a bear running loose on an October afternoon in Ohio. But maybe she was a little rattled. When the 911 operator asked for her first name, Mrs. Kopchak answered “Dolores,” the name on her birth certificate but one she never uses: “I’ve been called Dolly for eighty-four years.”</p> <p>Her son remained trapped in the barn. From there, looking through a north-facing window, he watched the menagerie grow. Along came a wolf. And a second bear, this one much larger than the first. And there was the lion he had seen before, now pacing back and forth. And also a lioness, anxiously scuttering around. “And then,” he says, “I saw a tiger. I’m telling you, the lion is bad enough, and the lioness is bad enough, and the wolf is bad, and the bear, but…don’t be around the tiger. The tigers are actually bigger than the lions if they’re fully grown. He started snarling, and went after the horses.”</p> </blockquote> </blockquote> <p><span class="contributor">[Photographs by<span class="name"><a href="http://www.gq.com/contributors/tim-flach" target="_blank">Tim Flach</a>]</span></span></p> <p><span class="contributor"><span class="name">This is a great read if you got some time.  Click through the link for the full story.</span></span></p> <p><span class="contributor"><span class="name"></span></span> </p> <p><span class="contributor"><span class="name"></span></span> </p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/17161912750http://riseaxelblog.com/post/17161912750Mon, 06 Feb 2012 10:48:55 -0800<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ly4ozoQjLN1qza49co1_500.png"/><br/><br/><p>It’s rare that Dailyseinfeld posts a scene I don’t remember but this was a breath of fresh air.  Love this blog for it’s simplicity.</p> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://www.dailyseinfeld.com/post/16982832693" target="_blank">dailyseinfeld</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><em>Jerry and Elaine sit side by side on a subway train. They’re both reading newspapers, when something occurs to Jerry.</em><br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: You know at the movies, they show that little ad for the concession stand?<br/><strong>ELAINE</strong>: Where the cartoon candy’s dancing and the Milk Dud’s playing the banjo?<br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: He’s wailing on that banjo.<br/><strong>ELAINE</strong>: Yeah.<br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: I just don’t understand the raisinettes.<br/><strong>ELAINE</strong>: The sax player?<br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: Yeah.<br/><strong>ELAINE</strong>: Yeah.<br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: The box of raisinettes runs up to the concession stand, buys another box of raisinettes.<br/><strong>ELAINE</strong>: So?<br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: Box of raisinettes eating another box of raisinettes? It’s perverse.<br/><strong>ELAINE</strong>: HE’s not gonna eat them. He’s buying ‘em for his Pepsi girlfriend.<br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: Why’s he dating a Pepsi? They’re not having children.<br/><strong>ELAINE</strong>: He’s a musician.<br/><strong>JERRY</strong>: Musicians. Get a real job.</p> <p>(via <a href="http://www.seinfeldscripts.com/TheEnglishPatient.html" target="_blank">The English Patient</a>)</p> </blockquote>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/16984993098http://riseaxelblog.com/post/16984993098Fri, 03 Feb 2012 11:24:31 -0800jakeandamir: No new video today due to the holidays, so instead, enjoy our favorite video of...http://riseaxelblog.com/post/15025019358http://riseaxelblog.com/post/15025019358Fri, 30 Dec 2011 05:34:05 -0800<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lwb1txUmdd1qz9b5wo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Got to the end of Bluebeard by Kurt Vonnegut Jr. this morning and had to literally stop exercising to finish the last chapter.</p> <p>I haven’t been moved by a novel that much in a long time. </p> <p>They may refer to his work as slapstick, black humor or satirical, but Vonnegut Jr. knew how to lay down the serious when it counts.</p> <p>I would definitely recommend this novel.</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/14312044538http://riseaxelblog.com/post/14312044538Fri, 16 Dec 2011 08:29:56 -0800BluebeardKurt Vonnegut Jr.Vonnegut<iframe width="400" height="225" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/KX5xh4AX2HU?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p>This is very hard to comprehend, but, this is really happening.</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/13703306533http://riseaxelblog.com/post/13703306533Sat, 03 Dec 2011 16:43:35 -0800StanleyThe OfficeAutotunemind=BLOWN<img src="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lvjdglYyrO1qz9b5wo1_500.png"/><br/><br/><p>That’s me, man. F*cking Work Horse!</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/13594790824http://riseaxelblog.com/post/13594790824Thu, 01 Dec 2011 09:48:21 -0800work horsedoodleinkart““Why does every black actor gotta rap some? I don’t know. All I know is...http://riseaxelblog.com/post/12927457863http://riseaxelblog.com/post/12927457863Thu, 17 Nov 2011 08:09:00 -0800CAMPChildish GambinoDonald GloverDrakeTake Care<img src="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lug9wlMdFW1qz9b5wo1_500.png"/><br/><br/><p>Harvest Moon</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/12599475005http://riseaxelblog.com/post/12599475005Thu, 10 Nov 2011 07:05:09 -0800harvest moondoodleinkhighlighter<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ludpkc3Dig1qz9b5wo1_500.png"/><br/><br/><p>Just listening to CAMP and doodling pictures of boat shoes. No big deal.</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/12548064753http://riseaxelblog.com/post/12548064753Tue, 08 Nov 2011 21:50:35 -0800doodlecampchildish gambino<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lsm9ubUbYV1qf8rjmo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Love it.</p> <p>Not Pictured:  The Li’l Sebastian memorial tattoo covering his entire back.</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/11106365013http://riseaxelblog.com/post/11106365013Thu, 06 Oct 2011 11:24:14 -0700Ron SwansonNick OffermanPaintingSam SprattIllustrationlolParks and RecreationNBCtelevision“Tony Romo This article is about the American football player. For the restaurant chain, see...http://riseaxelblog.com/post/11022677098http://riseaxelblog.com/post/11022677098Tue, 04 Oct 2011 08:49:17 -0700<span id="video_player_10229280294">[<a href="http://www.adobe.com/shockwave/download/download.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash" target="_blank">Flash 10</a> is required to watch video.]</span><script type="text/javascript">renderVideo("video_player_10229280294",'http://riseaxelblog.com/video_file/10229280294/tumblr_lrjohe0LIj1qz9b5w',400,711,'orientation=portrait\x26amp;portrait=true\x26amp;w={400}\x26amp;poster=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lrjohe0LIj1qz9b5w_r1_frame1.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lrjohe0LIj1qz9b5w_r1_frame2.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lrjohe0LIj1qz9b5w_r1_frame3.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lrjohe0LIj1qz9b5w_r1_frame4.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lrjohe0LIj1qz9b5w_r1_frame5.jpg')</script><br/><br/><p>This is what I come home to literally every day.</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/10229280294http://riseaxelblog.com/post/10229280294Wed, 14 Sep 2011 20:32:02 -0700welcomecat ass<img src="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lr8bwyWXSk1qz4s48o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://hello.bauldoff.com/post/9976401567" target="_blank">bauldoff</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><br/><em>“Everything was beautiful. Nothing hurt.”</em> Noticed <a href="http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Kurt_Vonnegut#God_Bless_You.2C_Dr._Kevorkian_.281999.29" target="_blank">Kurt Vonnegut’s desired epitaph</a> chalked upon this wall organizer near the end of Gary Hustwit’s <em><a href="http://www.objectifiedfilm.com/" target="_blank">Objectified</a></em>.</p> </blockquote>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9993008187http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9993008187Fri, 09 Sep 2011 05:46:13 -0700writersVonnegutHelveticaObjectifiedfilmUrbanizedEverything was beautifulNothing hurtHumanismphilosophyAnd as is tradition on this blog, I must make it my duty to thoroughly annihilate my opponents...http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9958215516http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9958215516Thu, 08 Sep 2011 08:29:21 -0700<iframe width="400" height="243" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/TMCf7SNUb-Q?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p>They cut out the part afterwards where the dolphin’s father comes in and tells him to get a real job.</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9731393792http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9731393792Fri, 02 Sep 2011 19:46:46 -0700<img src="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqrnmcAtSc1qz9b5wo1_500.png"/><br/><br/><p>Dear Guy who designs the Sports Authority junk mail,</p> <p>Thanks for detailing the two great locations for your stores…</p> <p>…ACROSS THE STREET FROM EACH OTHER.</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9606871229http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9606871229Tue, 30 Aug 2011 17:20:36 -0700<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqg6gi0sT31qe6vsbo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://gq.tumblr.com/post/9343004380/dodgers-jersey-chapter-11" target="_blank">gq</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>Best Dodgers jersey ever. [via <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/darrenrovell" target="_blank">@darrenrovell</a>]</p> </blockquote>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9350169622http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9350169622Wed, 24 Aug 2011 15:41:34 -0700sportsbaseballdodgers<span id="video_player_9237536811">[<a href="http://www.adobe.com/shockwave/download/download.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash" target="_blank">Flash 10</a> is required to watch video.]</span><script type="text/javascript">renderVideo("video_player_9237536811",'http://riseaxelblog.com/video_file/9237536811/tumblr_lqb7zjppKr1qz9b5w',400,225,'poster=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lqb7zjppKr1qz9b5w_r1_frame1.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lqb7zjppKr1qz9b5w_r1_frame2.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lqb7zjppKr1qz9b5w_r1_frame3.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lqb7zjppKr1qz9b5w_r1_frame4.jpg,http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lqb7zjppKr1qz9b5w_r1_frame5.jpg')</script><br/><br/><p>You know you golf at a cheap course when…</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9237536811http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9237536811Sun, 21 Aug 2011 20:21:19 -0700<img src="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lq2po5Edvd1qz9b5wo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>The worst of my many terrible Fantasy Football Draft Lotteries.  </p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9037471581http://riseaxelblog.com/post/9037471581Wed, 17 Aug 2011 06:04:53 -0700<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lpz8ewqVcl1qz9b5wo1_400.png"/><br/><br/><p>I finally settled on a Fantasy Football team name!</p>http://riseaxelblog.com/post/8954173502http://riseaxelblog.com/post/8954173502Mon, 15 Aug 2011 08:59:20 -0700