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It is once again Oscar season and after countless hours of sitting in RJ’s living room dissecting this year’s nominees I am ready to announce my predictions.

Key: Who will win/Who Should Win/Overrated

Best Picture:
Up In The Air/Precious/The Hurt Locker

Up In The Air was a good movie, with good actors, and a good director.  But that’s all it was; good.  Precious was amazing.  There was no Slumdog this year to steal the show so the safe bet will be Up In The Air.  As far as all this praise for The Hurt Locker; give me a break.  Its a giant cliche of a movie with absolutely no plot and mediocre acting.  People “love” it because its cool to love controversial war movies.  Do yourself a favor, go back about 5 years and find the 6ish-page short story written by the man who the film is based on in some old issue of Playboy.  Yeah, I read it, it was awesome.  The Hurt Locker?  Not so much.

Actor in a Leading Role:
Colin Firth/Jeff Bridges/Morgan Freeman

I didn’t see A Single Man but this seems like a very Oscar-typical pick.  Jeff Bridges will get snubbed…AGAIN!  Morgan Freeman as a robot in Invictus?  He’s done much, much better and if he were to win an Oscar for arguably his easiest role ever, well, that would be Matthew McConnoghey winning for Surfer Dude.

Actor In A Supporting Role:
Christoph Waltz/Stanley Tucci/ Matt Damon

Not that Waltz doesn’t deserve it.  He was awesome!  But Tucci gave me chills in every scene he was in.  Especially when you see his previous work and realize his amazing range.  Matt Damon…I’m sorry but Invictus was terribly boring and everyone had to underact due to the accents.

Actress In A Leading Role:
Helen Mirren/Carey Mulligan/Sandra Bullock

If Sandra Bullock wins I will FLIP!

Actress In A Supporting Role:
Penelope Cruz/Mo’Nique/Maggie Gyllenhaal

Cruz, because Nine has to win something.  Gyllenhaal because we had to look at her for 2 hours.  And lets just stop for a second to recognize the BEST acting of the whole entire year; Mo’Nique.  She MADE Precious what it was and every scene she was in was absolutely gripping.

Best Director:
Jason Reitman(Up In The Air)/Lee Daniels(Precious)/Kathryn Bigelow

Reitman did all the right things to win this award; great actors, great story, great timing.  Daniels did better with less; A virtual unknown star, a very controversial topic, and the daunting task of making Mariah Carey a decent actress.  Oh, Bigelow?  I hated The Hurt Locker.  You didn’t realize yet.  She took an amazing true story and turned it into cliche drivel.

Honorable Mentions:

• In The Loop-The best use of frequent profanity since The Big Lebowski.
• Crazy Heart-Its like Walk The Line with artistic freedom.
• The Lovely Bones-Better CGI than Avatar.  Plus, Mark Wahlberg isn’t in it THAT much, I promise.

The “Do Not See” List:

• A Serious Man-Everything you hated about No Country For Old Men without the cool stuff.
• Antichrist-JUST DONT!  Please trust me on this one.
• The Hurt Locker-See above.
• Invictus-If you love Rugby, see it.  If you’re like the other 99% of this country, don’t wast your time.