RISE AXELBLOG

Okay so it is technically #3.  I apologize.  It is week 4 in the NFL and I am up against my biggest challenge; Alex Quezada.  He beat me in the ‘Ship last year and he’s a talentet veteran of the game.  His team, Ryan Mathews Band, on the other hand, is about as valuable as it’s namesake.  Here we go:

• QB Kyle Orton- This guy looks like David Grohl’s fatter brother.  Even Kyle Orton bought a Tim Tebow jersey.
• RB Ray Rice-  He’s kinda like Jerry Rice…if you were to squish Jerry Rice down to the size of a bowling ball.
• RB Ahmad Bradshaw- With a name like Ahmad, it’s no wonder why your lack of skill can be compared to an act of terrorism on your team.
• RB Beanie Wells-  You’re gonna get thrown around the backfield like a child throws around a Beanie Baby.
• WR Mike Simms-Walker- Too bad its a Point-Per-Reception league…not a Point-Per-Name league.  (See also: BenJarvis Green-Ellis)
• WR Johnny Knox-  I would rather have Johnny Knoxville on my team than this Jackass!
• TE Todd Heap- of Shit. Too easy. 
• DEF Browns-  I think even the city of Cleveland wouldn’t start the Browns defense if they had a choice.
• K Matt Bryant-  What is the deal with Kickers looking like Rapists?